Posted by: Daniel Levis
December 31, 2008
Issue #580

The Neutron Bomb Of Persuasion!

And how the simplest words can come together to release a mind-blowing flood of motive energy …

In this article:

• The true nature of words …
• Your six-point word choice checklist …
• Two words to never put on your order buttons that everyone does …
• How a trial lawyer twists words to win judges and influence juries!
• And much more!

Dear Web Business-Builder,

You can have the best sales message in the world, but your prospects will always understand it through the prism of their own emotions, preconceptions, prejudices, and pre-existing beliefs – not yours.

For that reason, your choice of words can have a remarkable impact on how your message is understood. Choosing the right words rides on your taking an imaginative leap into your prospect’s shoes to know how they’re thinking and feeling.

But what are they anyway – words?

They’re symbols aren’t they? Every one of them a marvelous mental nucleus of thought, imagery, and feeling … that when combined with other nuclei form a kind of cerebral nuclear fusion that has the power to arouse desire … explode inertia … and move your prospect to action.

Symbolism is the neutron bomb of persuasion!

When you compose a thought, you have at your disposal, choices. Word symbols that each turn a different mental lock, regardless of the similarity in meaning. The right choice is the one that cracks the code for the specific audience you’re writing to.

Some word symbols are packed with raw honesty and visceral power, while others are stuffed with pomp and pretence.

Shall we play with some?

I love the word “ultimate.” It’s a wonderfully versatile superlative, don’t you think?

Can you image the below headline reading “The Worst Betrayal!” or the “The Most Terrible Betrayal,” or “The Evilest Betrayal!” It just wouldn’t work.

Overwhelming Evidence!

Washington parasites are quietly
conspiring to rob you of your life savings in
The Ultimate Betrayal!

Or can you imagine if the below bullet read … The Revolting Economic Obfuscation Federal Government Spokespeople Hope You Never Learn About …

The Shocking Economic Cover-Up Washington Spin Doctors Hope You Never Discover …

Or if the below sub-head were written … Your store of economic value will soon be jeopardized!

Your wealth is in imminent danger!

What makes a good word choice anyway?

Here’s my 6-point word choice checklist.

1. Is there a shorter word that can express the same meaning?

Short words are easier to read, and more likely to be understood (Fewer than 27% of American adults over the age of 25 are college educated). And short words often pack more emotional punch than longer words with similar meanings.

Plain talk sounds like the truth. Lengthy, highfalutin sounding words woven into flowery rhetoric give the impression you’ve got something to hide.

All things being equal, the short word is the best choice. And the more short words you use, the more impact a few less common longer ones will have by contrast.

2. Is there a word that does the same job, but with more emotional impact?

Emotion is what stirs people to action, and so it follows that emotion-evoking words are a positive force in your copy. People will forget what you say, but they always remember how you made them feel.

But don’t go overboard. There is a point when your copy becomes overwritten, and obviously manipulative. You DO want to tell people how to feel. You DON’T want to get caught doing it.

3. Is there a single word or pithy expression that can replace multiple words?

The fewer words you use to convey a thought, the better. Compare the visceral impact of the following two headlines. The meaning is the same, but the one with half the words has easily twice the attention getting power.

A Decline in Real Estate Values
Could Come At Any Moment!

VS.

REAL ESTATE BUST
Dead Ahead!

This ability to compress and compact meaning into few words is, in many ways, the essence of power copywriting.

4. Is the word, or expression, metaphorically appropriate?

Metaphors often allow you to compress meaning, and have the added benefit of turning up the emotional heat and intensity of your copy. Here’s the deck that appeared under the above headline, with the metaphors highlighted.

• 5 reasons why Wall Street is DEAD WRONG about a soft landing in housing, and how a dramatic historically unprecedented free fall in Real Estate values is now virtually locked in …
• What you must do IMMEDIATELY to insulate your net worth from a collapse in housing prices that could mushroom into the most painful economic crash in American history …
• How to pile up potential profits of 131% … 138% … up to 177%, with little known “insider” strategies that can quickly multiply your wealth in a falling market!

ALSO – NAMED IN THIS BULLETIN:
10 Stocks in the Path of the Hurricane - DUMP THESE DOGS NOW, before they flatten your portfolio!

For a word or phrase to be metaphorically appropriate, it must be familiar to the target market, and consistent with other metaphorical language used in the copy. You don’t want to create a mixed metaphor soup that distracts from the message.

5. Is there a word that just sounds better, and still conveys the right meaning?

A string of words that begin with the same first letter, the same sound, or that create a pleasing rhythm or rhyme is more captivating than a random collection of sounds.

I’m not talking about going overboard into the land of slogans and jingles, but there is music and rhythm to language. And it should be part of your word choices.

Note the rhythmic quality of the repeated words, and the multiple F sounds in this sub-head. Catchy isn’t it?

LIES, LIES, LIES,
and more LIES!

Grow up to 20 Times RICHER with each
Phony Fact & Funny Figure …

6. Is there a word or phrase that communicates a more desirable mental visual?

The mind thinks in pictures. You are the painter and words are your palette.

Nouns are the building blocks of your painting. Adjectives bring them into focus. Verbs add action.

The pictures you paint color your prospect’s emotions and thinking. Consider these two phrases.

- Drilling for Oil
- Energy Exploration

If you’re an oil company coming under increasing pressure from environmental groups to clean up your act, which one of the two phrases should you use in your corporate communications?

“Drilling for Oil” conjures up all kinds of negative images that fuel environmentalist ire. “Energy Exploration” is emotionally neutral.

Here are a couple of common examples of words that are used frequently in advertising that create undesirable images in the minds of your prospects, and some suggested alternatives.

Very often a Web page will exhort you to “Buy Now!” Does this pass the Claude Hopkins acid test?

“There is one simple way to answer many advertising questions. Would it help a salesman sell the goods? Would it help me if I met a buyer in person?”

Claude C. Hopkins

“So Mr. Prospect, now that you’ve seen everything the Whosit widget can do for you, would you like to buy now?”

I can assure you the answer will be “No”. To “Buy” conjures up all kinds of scary images. It’s sure to set the “better think it over” alarm bells ringing deafeningly in their heads.

Nearly everyone balks at making a decision that’s going to cost money, yet online marketers far and wide continue to use this sales killing “Buy Now” phrase. Instead, they should be humoring their prospects, and telling them frankly: “Don’t decide now. Try it, and then decide!”

If you offer a guarantee – and you should – you’re completely within your bounds to replace the word “buy” with “try.” How much easier is that?

Some other proven replacements for the verb “Buy” are “Reserve,” “Claim,” “Send for,” or one of my favorites “Click here for Instant Download.” I just love that one.

Sometimes you’ll need to refer to the cost or price of your product. Investment has a far more positive connotation in most people’s minds.

Learn is another very common word in selling. Consider replacing it with the word discover. Most people associate learning with the tedium of the classroom, and discovery with what happened in the back seat of Dad’s Chevy.

What we’re talking about here is reframing: the transmutation of the undesirable to the desirable. Nothing is objective. Everything is subjective. It’s not what you say. It’s what people think and feel when they hear it.

Let me leave you with a fascinating story that demonstrates the incredible power of this concept:

When Marlon Brando’s son Christian was charged with murder in 1990, legendary spin technician Robert Shapiro (famous for getting O.J. off) was brought in.

Christian had admitted to shooting his sister’s fiancé at point blank range. He faced the possibility of being convicted for first-degree murder – and the death penalty.

Shapiro on examining the case determined there was a legal angle that would allow his client to plead guilty to manslaughter. The problem was that it would be very difficult to explain this complicated theory. Shapiro knew he needed to communicate his defense in terms that people could understand.

The defense was twofold:

“First, that there was no intent by Brando to commit a crime, so therefore it was accidental.

“And second, that the intent required is not a specific intent but rather a general intent, and so that would fall under the guise of involuntary manslaughter.”

Shapiro coined the phrase “accidental manslaughter” and repeated it hundreds of times throughout the proceedings. The phrase does not appear anywhere in any law book.

Yet to this day, when people talk about the case they say that Christian Brando pleaded guilty to “accidental manslaughter” – A charge that does not exist.

Until next time, Good Selling!

Daniel Levis
Editor, The Web Marketing Advisor
THE TOTAL PACKAGE

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9 Comments »

1. Comment by Caleb Osborne — December 31, 2008 @ 10:12 am

   Wow,

   The brando court case trial is an AMAZING example of your point Daniel!

   – Caleb

2. Comment by Chris Lake — December 31, 2008 @ 10:13 am

   I’m a proud “word nerd” but I know I need to restrain myself better. I was shocked by the statistic of 27% college educated… it stopped me right there and made me reconsider who a “typical” audience probably is. Granted, certain lists will be much more targeted by education, but thinking of a general-interest product like Bowflex or the George Foreman Grill — definitely not likely to be more than the one-quarter college educated audience.

   Thanks for a great 2008 full of tips, tricks, wisdom, and humor. Best for 2009….

   Chris Lake

3. Comment by Leon Altman — December 31, 2008 @ 10:13 am

   Excellent article.
   I think above all what it shows is that for all the talk of copy “formulas,” a feel for LANGUAGE and a facility with METAPHORS are required to take copy to the highest levels.

4. Comment by Shane — December 31, 2008 @ 10:15 am

   Damn! Best totalpackage post I’ve read in quite some time.

   Regards
   Shane
   Twitter: shanearthur

5. Comment by Shaniak Journey — December 31, 2008 @ 2:29 pm

   How cool…

   I use the same questions in my own way when it comes to choosing the “right” word for a headlines and articles.

   I treat it like it’s a game. Putting the effort in that mindset makes it alot more fun than work.

   Love the article. Just reminded me how fun it is to play my word games regularly.

6. Comment by mark — December 31, 2008 @ 2:50 pm

   Long sales letters are old school!

   I have read the articles on this site for a few months now and since the year is ending…thought I would post my views.

   Long sales letters only serve one purpose…stroke the ego of the person writing them. Sure they create some income… but to be really good the secret is short and compelling brain stoppers.

   Few copywriters have the skill to put their ego aside.

   I wrote a piece for a company that was mailed as a postcard…it had one sentence…the company thought I was too busy with larger concerns to devote my full attention to them…they were only familiar with long boring drawn out 25 page mumbo jumbo…I persuaded them to give it a try…they weren’t prepared for the overwhelming response.

   There’s money to be made in the long letters If you’re targeting a market that wants to learn how to write long letters that sell info on how to write long letters to sell info.

   Long letters appeal to your client list only…expand your skills and catch the ones that weren’t prepared to hear your captive message.

   Most internet surfers immediately leave a site with a long sales letter.

   There are commercials that sell millions of dollars in products, yet are only 2 minutes in length…I know because I’ve written some.

   Oh well…before I make this a long post I better close.

   Thanks for reading.

7. Comment by Steve Newdell — December 31, 2008 @ 7:26 pm

   Good Day Daniel
   Good Day Friends,

   If you were up early and somewhat lucky you saw two articles offered on the same page by Yahoo. One is the 10 words we must never, never use in 2009 according to a university. The other is the words we must never ever use while writing advertising. Never!

   I suppose no matter what you write from now on “free” must be replaced by “gratis”
   “no charge”
   “For nothing”
   “Nyet, nada, zip, zippo, zero, not required”
   “we require absolutely no money”
   “Keep you wallet in your pocket”

   Ignore them all. If I’m offered a free look at a book I’m taking it and I don’t care if it means gratis or not!

   And finally, the one phrase no one mentioned is given for your serious consideration here: (and I have seen ever one of these, the first today in a beautifully done graphic full monitor frame ad on line)

   For all your South West Florida Fishing Needs
   For All you Septic System Needs (written by my boss’s wife who “studied marketing in college.” Hush, silence! Be Reverent!)
   For all your spice needs
   For all your painting needs
   For all your plumbing needs
   Your Cooking needs
   Kitchen needs
   Car repair needs
   Yacht maintenance needs
   Hurricane protection needs
   Home security needs

   (How do I know what my needs are if YOU don’t tell me?)

   Oh my word I’m going to go out of my mind! What has happened to imagination? Has most of the country turned into a band of blathering idiots with a 200 word vocabulary?

   As in: “I speak Amerikan therefore I know all there is to know about advertising and marketing, and I know it don’t work!”

   Good tidings for 2009. Let the discussions continue, and THANKS TO YOU Daniel Levis, Mr. and Mrs. Clayton Makepeace, Gary Bencivenga, Carolyn Cole, Drayton Bird, Larry Chase, H. Gordon Lewis, David Deutsch, John Carlton, Troy White, Ken McCarthy, John Ford, and so many other generous gentlemen and ladies for a wonderful, useful and educational year. I’ve learned so much. I just went through piece I wrote after reading this and replaced all the word “learn” with something else.

   Thank you from all of your readers. I look forward to making this year the year I come out of the office and into the light.

   Steve Newdell

8. Comment by Jo Kumar — January 1, 2009 @ 6:27 am

   Excellent writing. Reveals the importance of right words while communicating. Again, right words depend upon the type of audience.It was really shocking to know that 75 percent population over 25 years of age has never gone to college. Now I understand the real need to communicate in their own language. Of course, one must take care not to manipulate people with words - even the ordinary man can see through it easily. Your blog was informative and educative. Thanks.

9. Comment by Marcelino Latorre — January 1, 2009 @ 9:40 am

   One day my words be worth millions thanks to the generous Spirit here at the total package.

   Wow that electrifies me when I say it :)

   I hope everyone here is ready for an explosive year!

   Thank you Mr. Levis for the nice lesson, once again.

   Marcelino Latorre
   Fundraiser/ Copy-Slammer From the Streets!!
   787-549-3567