Set a Path to Keep Your Resolutions
Dear Business Builder,
Happy Friday! I hope you’ve had a fantastic holiday so far. And, I hope it’s brought you everything you’ve hoped for … special gifts, family togetherness, much needed downtime, an opportunity to help someone less fortunate or perhaps the sheer magic of time spent with awestruck children.
Here we are yet again at a time of new beginnings. 2008 is upon us and it’s time to trot out our New Years resolutions. For many years, I boycotted resolution making altogether … realizing that come early March they’d be dropped in a final fit of defeat. Especially since my resolutions always seemed to comprise the old standards – lose that extra 15 pounds and start a regular schedule of exercise. Perhaps I dropped them because it finally dawned on me I’m not built for strenuous exercise and I have an unnatural obsession with Double Chocolate Fudge Brownie Ice Cream.
But, over the last few years I’ve picked up the resolutions again. Only this time around, I’m not the young critic I used to be. Instead of the resolutions that speak to my negative self image, I set attainable goals that speak to my overall well-being and professional success.
In years past, I’ve set income goals with specific easy steps to achieve them with much success. I’ve set and achieved goals to raise my overall presence and professional profile. And most importantly, I’ve set and achieved goals that have allowed me to spend more quality time with my family and be a bigger presence in the lives of my kids.
Once I set the goals and outlined the steps to achieve them, it’s amazing how the opportunities for success suddenly appeared. Rather than focus on the deprivation involved in weight loss, I shifted my focus to abundance and that made all the difference.
The Secret to Keeping Your Resolutions
Notice I don’t say New Years resolutions in my subhead. Resolutions need not only be made at the beginning of the year. Many of my most successful resolutions have been made mid-year once the memory of the New Year has faded. For instance, early this summer after reading the 4-Hour Work Week, I made the resolution to pair down my work load to a more manageable and profitable level. I made some tough decisions, set a clear-cut path, and by the end of September, I achieved the goals I’d set for myself.
I’ve found that the success to keeping resolutions comes from not only creating the goal, but from setting a clear path to achieving the goal. Let me show you how it’s done using weight loss as the example:
Many of us start the New Year by stating “this year I’m going to finally lose weight.” But simply making the statement on New Years morning is not nearly enough to make it happen. Immediately thereafter, we head off to that New Year’s Day barbeque where we stuff our faces with hamburgers, potato salad, beer and cherry pie. We promptly state “tomorrow I’ll start my diet.” Yet tomorrow, January 2nd, we go back to work to tons of leftover cookies, cakes and all the goodies the soon-to-be dieters drag into the office because they don’t want it in the house. And so starts the cycle of “tomorrow I start my diet.”
Rather, we should set small attainable goals to get us to the end result … but only after we determine the true end result. Using the diet example, the goal might be to “lose 5 pounds a month over the next 3 months by drinking 8 glasses of water a day, eating 3 servings of fruit a day, eating 3 vegetarian meals a week, cutting our portions sizes by half and walking for 30 minutes 3 times a week.” Then, you further map out and track the goal so that you stick with it and stay on track. Minor setbacks are okay, but by having a plan you can quickly get back on track. After the 3 months, you assess where you’re at and make adjustments as you need to keep moving toward the desired end result.
But, the most important secret to keeping your resolutions is to get rid of your inner critic. You know that little voice inside your head that never shuts up. The one that tells you “you’re not good enough … smart enough … or strong enough to make your dreams come true.” Every day we show other people forgiveness, yet we can’t forgive ourselves for being human. As soon as we come to grips with the fact we are human and we make mistakes (and are forgiven those mistakes) achieving our goals becomes so much easier.
The easiest way I know to silence your inner critic is through gratitude. By recognizing and being grateful for what we have, what we’ve accomplished and what we’ve done right we can finally realize just how far we’ve come.
With gratitude you have to start big … be grateful for your health or a roof over your head. Be grateful for a healthy family and supportive friends. Be grateful for food and the fact you have a refrigerator to put it in. Only after you truly recognize and are grateful for all the things you take for granted can you truly be grateful for lives real luxuries … like a fabulous spring ski trip to Colorado!
Hope that helped and stay tuned …
Because next week I’m going to spend some time talking about my New Years resolution … networking and meeting new JV partners.
Until next week,
Julie McManus
Editor, In the ‘Net Trenches
THE TOTAL PACKAGE
And Web Media Goddess
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Comment by Bard Thomas Hesvik — January 4, 2008 @ 3:35 am
Cheers Julie,
A great reminder for all who are having a hard time at this time of year. May I just add one thing; you must WANT IT! If you don\’t WANT to quit smoking, it doesn\’t matter how much you realize that you should quit!
Happy New Year
Bard Thomas